Wait! It’s Still Summer!

Gadzooks! Is it college football time already? Freshman
move-in weekend and its attendant spectacle of unleashed 18-year-olds
barfing in the bushes hasn’t even happened here in Collegetown yet,
but already major college football has invaded the airwaves.

At first, when I caught the game on cable, I thought it was a Classic
replay, but no, it was live. Then I was sure it was some obscure Division
3 game in a desperate

attempt to  become the New Hampsire primary of college
football. But no, it was California against fifth-ranked Kansas State.
Fifth ranked? How can they have rankings in August, before anyone has
played a game? How naiive of me, the oddsmakers need their lines, 24-7.

But didn’t college football season used to start in September and end
on New Year’s Day? Doesn’t it seem that all of these seasons are getting
longer? What’s up with basketball and hockey games in June?  Are
we headed for a climate-controlled future where all sports are played
year-round and televised live on their own channels?

Returning to those supposed preseason national rankings, they put the
O-Boys, Oklahoma and Ohio State, at the top. Fuggedaboudit says Norman
Chad, the self-proclaimed Boston Globe Couch
Slouch in today’s column.  Mount
Union (Ohio) will win it all.

Ah, but Mount Union is Division 3, you say. What, Mount Union can’t
compete with Ohio State? How do you know for sure? You ever see ”Hoosiers?”

(Didn’t David slay Goliath? Didn’t Buster Douglas fell Mike Tyson?
Didn’t Lyle Lovett conquer Julia Roberts?)

from
the Boston Globe