Archive for October 4th, 2004

Australian Tickler Closes Airport

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An adult sex toy sparked a security scare which closed an Australian airport
for nearly an hour.
The vibrating object was discovered at Mackay Airport by a security officer
who noticed a suspicious package inside a rubbish bin.

Cafeteria manager Lynne Bryant said her staff had been cleaning tables
when they noticed a strange humming noise coming from the rubbish bin.

"It was rather disconcerting when the rubbish bin started humming
furiously," she
told the Herald Sun.

"We called security and next minute everybody was being evacuated
while they checked it out."
The police spokeswoman said the terminal was evacuated immediately.

Ms Bryant said in retrospect the humming sounded exactly like a vibrator
– but it was better to be safe then sorry.

from Ananova

 

Poodle Liberation Front

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The
recent advertising
campaign
sponsored by that pillar of American political
discourse the NRA which depicts john Kerry as a Frech Poodle has inspired
a firestorm of protest – from Poodle owners who decry the comparison
as an unprincipled attack on a superior breed.

Note, for example, the following letter
to the editor
of
the Boston Globe:

COULDN’T help but chuckle as I read a story in the Sept.
30 Globe pointing out that the National Rife Association is spending
millions of dollars on an ad campaign designed to discredit John Kerry
by portraying him as a poodle along with the slogan "This Dog
Don’t Hunt"

By running such a campaign, the NRA has proven its ignorance if not its
immaturity. Standard poodles are well known around the world as extraordinary
hunting dogs, ideal retrievers well suited to work in the water.

OK, poodles have an image problem and the haircut doesn’t help. But
poodles are highly intelligent dogs able to reason solutions to problems
that
will help their owners get what they want, whether it’s a newspaper
from the front steps or a recently shot bird that landed offshore.

I’m neither an advocate for the poodle nor an enemy of the NRA. In
fact, I own I own a Portuguese water dog, and I’m a supporter of hunters’
rights
and Americans’ right to bear arms. But, like poodles, intelligent gun
control laws aren’t as bad as the NRA makes them out to be. At this
critical point in our nation’s history, wouldn’t it be nice if we started
to use
rational thinking and facts to back up our political opinions rather
than slander and emotion?

DAVID MANCUSO
Melrose

original NRA ad here

Boston Globe story on the story here

letter to the editor here

Hurt Hand, Hand Hurts

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The
Dowbrigade has somehow wrecked up his hand, which is swolen and painful
to the point of inoperability. The curious thing is that we cannot remember
any traumatic incident which could have produced such an injury; we did
not punch a wall, or a person, or catch it in a car door, or an elevator
door,
shake hands with any power-lifters or macho republicans, pet any sharks
or elephants, catch any 100 mph fastballs or bags of gold trickling down
from above. Yet our right ring finger is swollen like a sausage and painful
as a porcupine butt-massager. Tomorrow a doctor will tell us what exactly
we have done this time.

Luckily, we can still copy and paste. Commenntary may be
limited for a while. Stay tuned….