We Rest Our Case


is always gratifying when one of our ridiculous rants is immediately
ratified by an unrelated local news story. It was just yesterday that
we (the Dowbrigade
and his buddy the wisecracking traffic cop) were decrying
the lack of manners
and civil
respect for the traffic regulations on the part of the rich, foreign
born members of our community.

Many of these individuals grew up in rich and privileged families in
their far-flung points of origin, families that were in fact largely
exempt form the law of their lands, particularly those minor rules and
regulations governing things like driving and parking. THOSE laws largely
exist to keep the streets clear for important people. And all of this
in countries in which the general attitude toward traffic rules
is one of enlightened neglect. Is it any wonder that they are confused
by traffic laws that are actually enforced, by beat cops who can’t be
bribed, bluffed or intimidated? Is it not obvious why cops love busting
these obnoxious foreign weenies (although they would probably catch some
heat from beating up Crown Prince Haakon of Norway)? Is it any surprise
that the Dowbrigade has emotional conflicts pertaining to his job, which
depends on these people?

But Francois Youhanna, a Lebanese native who now owns a West Roxbury
bodyguard service and drives a Hummer, stepped over the line when he
parked illegally in front of a Starbucks near Berkeley St. and went in
to get a cuppa Joe, leaving his girlfriend guarding the tank. Actually,
that wasn’t really over the line – happens hundreds of times a day. The
meter lady (what is the PC euphanism, Parking Enforcement Official?)
asked the girlfriend to move it and she refused (she was probably more
afraid of Francois’ reaction if she moved his Hummer than of the meter

As the
inevitable$55 ticket was being written Francois showed up with the
coffee. He demanded the public official stop. She refused. So naturally,
he threw the hot coffee in her face.
First and second degree burns and a trip to the New England Medical
Center ensued. Meter people hate it when that happens. Suspect arrested
for Assault and Battery with a Deadly Weapon – the hot coffee! We are
sure, as the dude says, that it was an accident:

Youhanna insisted he spilled the coffee on Noviello by mistake after
slipping on some ice and falling, a story his female companion echoed.
But witnesses said Youhanna – who is 6-foot-2 and 200 pounds – charged
at the meter maid and was very close to her face when the coffee was

from the Boston Herald


  1. baxter case

    January 21, 2005 @ 9:56 pm


    what you think is precognitive sychronicity might in fact be prophetic conjeuring and you and the policeman and howard stern intersecting at one of your personal power points astral plane access and as so is it astral so below in the physical giving wavy gravy resonance means you are the effective causal agent in coffee into the womans face input symbolic oxidizing her face in telepathic generation floating “they practically laughed in his face” with your coyote trickster twist because the mushroom spirits still live in you into the collective unconscious and the poor humvee driver was merely an acting out from the collective unconscious when he effectively went unconscious through his angry reaction.

    Is one possiblity in acausal logic

  2. adamg

    January 22, 2005 @ 10:21 am


    Only funny angle to this stupid story was the reporter on WBZ radio announcing the perp’s first name as Fran-ko-iz.

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