American Mysteries

Inevitably, the above Adam@Home comic from today’s paper brought bouncing
back to mind the Becker’s Big Boy franchise on Culver Road back in Pittsford,
New York, the site of the Dowbrigade’s very first "date", with the unforgettably
spectacular Betsy Sibley.

For those of our readers too young to remember the politically incorrect
"Big Boy" franchise, each one featured the first name of the franchise
owner (Bob’s Big Boy, Billy’s Big Boy, there seems to have been a requirement
that owners have names starting with the letter "B") and an 8-foot plastic
statue of
this poster boy for adolescent obesity. Note the signature checkerboard
overalls and the extremely cool pompadour hairdo.

Their feature sandwich was, of course, the "Big Boy", a towering construction
of partly-beef patties, various vegetables, gooey creams and sauces and
rilled pickles. It made the Big Mac seem like a low-fat chicken wrap in
comparison.

Who knows why this All-American chain faded from public favor while Macdonald’s
and Wendy’s thrived? Who knows why Betsy Sibley dumped us like a leaking
Bic pen in 7th grade, to hang with a far cooler crowd. Last we heard, she
married her karate teacher. American mysteries.