Penile Panacea: Licensed to Kill

As
part of our continuing efforts to warn Americans of the growing Wave
of Asian Weirdness represented by the emergence of the demographic colossus
China on the world stage,
we present Grandmaster
Tu Jin-Sheng, inventor and chief practitioner of Penis Qigong.

According
to its practitioners Penis Qigong is an incredibly powerful amd demanding martial
art, focusing hard on the center of growth and energy in the body – the
genitals.

We know that this sounds like a gag, but as far as we
can tell, it is completely on the up and up.  Tu
Jin-Sheng is a noted master of Qigong and Chinese medicine who graduated
from the prestigious Teachers Physical College of Taiwan with a degree
in
martial arts and also earned his master’s in Traditional Chinese Medicine.
From an article in Kungfu
Magazine:

As Tu sees it, people train every other part of their
body except their sexual organs. He considers his method as the only
way to correct
this oversight. While most people think the only exercise a penis gets
is ejaculation, Tu’s method treats the penis like an arm, a leg or
any other part of the body. Tu comments "People compete will all
their four limbs, why not this?"

As one might imagine, this is a very delicate practice,
so it is of utmost importance that a student follow the direction of
a qualified master. Penis qigong uses a variety of special exercises,
including massage, slapping, pulling and hitting it with a tool.

Even in our immodest modern world, penis training
is seldom seen. Master Tu believes this type of qigong kungfu has been
kept behind closed doors for two main reasons. Firstly, the Chinese
people are conservative by nature, so many judge this to be a prurient
practice and avoid discussing it seriously. Secondly and more interestingly,
this kungfu focuses on the reproductive organs, the very base of human
life, so it is immensely powerful. Masters had to find the right pupils
to receive the teachings or they would not pass it on.

But today, Tu exalts this practice as a penile panacea. He claims
it can prevent old age and diseases, increase energy and vitality,
make
muscles and bones stronger, reduce arterial blockage, cholesterol
levels, diabetes, allergies and ear problems. Additionally, of
course, it can
greatly enhance sexual performance.

from Kungfu
Magazine (including Master Tu Jin-Sheng’s
Penis Qigong Tips)
and speaking of tips, Thanks, Adamg!