f/k/a archives . . . real opinions & real haiku

February thaw
a new patch of orange
on the river

… by dagosan

Catching another sunset or two in photos before we “archivize” this weblog on Saturday seemed like a good idea, as the afternoon waned today. [click “more” below to see some of the photographs]  Naturally, I managed to dawdle so long at this keyboard that I only caught the last few moments before the sun dipped behind nearby hills.  My timing was a metaphor of sorts for much that has happened (and not) lately in my life.  Of course, the sunset itself was a too-obvious symbol (along with the promised sunrise after a long dark night) for the ending of an important era in my life. (more…)

.. The tired old fogies at f/k/a want to thank the energetic Scott Greenfield for covering the latest Schenectady cop scandal at his Simple Justice weblog, so we won’t have to think too hard this morning.  See “Even Cops Need Some Sleep” (Feb. 19, 2009)

• Teaser: Schenectady Police Officer Dwayne Johnson made three times his base pay last year, while averaging 75 hours a week on the clock (making him, at $168,000, the highest paid employee in Schenectady’s history).  However, after several late-night stakeouts, Schenectady Gazette reporter Kathleen Moore reported yesterday that Officer Johnson has been parking his car outside a local apartment that is not his home for a few hours every Tuesday night since November, during his patrol shift.   Despite being tracked by a GPS monitor in his unit, no supervisor caught the apparent dereliction of duty.  See “Chief: Cop ‘stealing time’: Johnson, tops in pay, out of car during shift”  (by Kathleen Moore, Feb. 18, 2009).

Responding to the question from Schenectady Police Chief Mark Chaires, “how dumb can you get?”, Scott points out that “neither Chief Chaires nor anybody else on the force thinks that somebody ought to take the occasional gander at their top earner, the big money man, to make sure they are getting their money’s worth?” Scott then muses: “How dumb? Not as dumb as you, Chief.”

Follow-ups today (Feb. 19, 2009): “Cop case probed for collusion: Chief wants to know why supervisors didn’t notice AWOL officer’s absences” (Daily Gazette , Feb. 19, 2009); “Editorial: In Sch’dy, Car 10, where are you?” (Daily Gazette, Feb. 19, 2009; “He deserves to be fired, and anybody but a union officer or lawyer, or perhaps arbitrator, would agree.”); “High-paid cop accused of slacking off” (WNYT/CH.13, Feb. 18, 2009, with video); “Did Schenectady’s $168G cop spend hours away? Schenectady probes whether highest-paid officer was at apartment while on duty” (Albany Times Union, February 19, 2009); “Tarnishing the badge: A decade of trouble for Schenectady police” (Times Union, by Paul Nelson, Feb. 19, 2009)

update (Feb. 20, 2009): The Gazette tells us this morning that Officer Johnson was “suspended without pay Thursday while the department investigates the extent of his absences during his overnight patrols.”  He apparently will have to be paid if kept on suspension longer than 30 days. “Absent officer out for month: Bennett begins cop AWOL probe; union issues cited” (Feb. 20, 2009).  I’m surprised that Public Safety Commissioner Wayne Bennett believes “it will take well over a month to finish the investigation into Johnson’s absences. Also under review are the supervisors who did not notice them and the officers who may have tipped him off when internal affairs attempted to catch him in the act early last Tuesday.”  I’m not surprised that he expects the police union to argue napping has become a “past practice,” approved regularly by lower-level supervisors, that cannot be changed without union approval.

The Gazette notes that “Some officers, who spoke anonymously, say everyone who works long shifts takes naps, beginning at lunchtime. They argued that an unspoken rule in the department allows napping to continue after lunch as long as police get up as soon as they get a call.”  Bennett says: “If someone had the absolute and unmitigated gall to call [napping] a past practice, well, supervisors do not have that kind of authority to authorize that.”

In his update this morning at Simple Justice, Scott Greenfield trumpets “The new frontier for police contracts: Napping Clauses.”

Officer Johnson is 49 years old and apparently considers a double shift to be his regular work day.  The f/k/a Gang understands the need to nap (although, altogether, we alter egos aren’t working 75 hours a week), but we agree with the Gazette that if the conduct is proven, Officer Johnson should be fired.  At the very least, some major auditing of his time records is needed, plus more scrutiny of his so-called supervisors.

Undercover? Lawyer Greenfield concludes: “But don’t fear that Johnson will go unpunished. My bet is that his wife will have a few questions about what he was doing in that apartment every Tuesday morning.”

We don’t get paid overtime (nor anytime) here at f/k/a, but we’re always workin’ hard trying to bring you some of the best haiku around.  As promised yesterday, here are poems written by a few of our Honored Guest Poets that were selected for the newest issue of Frogpond [Vol. 32:1, Winter 2009].  We’ll have another batch later this week.

turning back on a dead end street —
one odor changes
another

… by Gary Hotham – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

heat lightning the crooked split in the watermelon

… by w.f. owen – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

second honeymoon
a flock of turnstones
skirt the shore

dry spell
a field sparrow flashes
burnt umber

… by Tom Painting – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

full moon–
I finally share the secret
with my cat

….. by Alice Frampton – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

fallen leaves
ornament
the small fir

the barren windbreak sifting a rainy fog

…. by Tom Clausen – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

winter night
the heat comes on
between us

a retinal sun
wanders through
the observation car

… by John Stevenson – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

our long bathtub soak — 
a ring around
the moon

…. by David Giacalone – Frogpond Vol. 32:1 (Winter 2009)

p.s. Speaking of criminal justice in Schenectady, the print version of the Daily Gazette has an article on p. B3 titled “Imposter [sic] suspect in Regents exam faces lesser charge” (Feb. 19, 2009).  In it we learn that District Attorney Robert Carney won’t be charging Deandre M. Ellis with burglary [illegally entering a building intending to commit another crime] for entering a Schenectady school to take a Regents exam in disguise for another student.  We were doubtful of the arresting officers’ legal reasoning in a post on Jan. 29, 2009 (scroll to second story).  Instead, Ellis is being charged with misdemeanor criminal impersonation, which he denied at his arraignment yesterday. DA Carney explains that “There has to be some sort of notice or communication to [a] person that ‘you’re not welcome’ to convert [entering a public building like a school] to a trespass,” on which to hang a burglary count.  According to the Gazette:

“But Carney likened the case to a shoplifter.  Anyone is allowed in a store, until they’re asked to leave. But a shoplifter isn’t charged with burglary, Carney said, even though they may have entered with the intent to steal.”

Tonsorial-forensic experts should note a mystery raised in the case:  Ellis wore a wig when posing as a female student in January.  As you can see above, he has short spiky hair in his mug shot.  But, three weeks later, he appeared in court with “long hair, past his shoulders.”  Neither Ellis nor his public defender were willing to comment on the issue.   Could it be Ellis will claim he always goes around in the long wig and therefore was not trying to impersonate the female student?

..  two good ideas from Schenectady County . .

.. they’re back: Lawrence’s Valentine Flamingos, 2009  ..

As we reported in detail this time last year in “Lawrence and the Flamingos – a Stockade Valentine mystery,” a flock of pink flamingos (genus “phoenicopteris ruber plasticus“ ) has been returning each Valentine’s Day to the traffic circle home of Lawrence the Indian, at the intersection of Front, Ferry and Green Streets, in Schenectady’s Stockade neighborhood.  The f/k/a Gang planned to be up at sunrise on Saturday, February 14th, to see whether our Valentine Flamingo miracle would continue in 2009, and to snap some pictures, if it did.

To our surprise, while strolling the neighborhood at sunset tonight, February 13, the “flamboyance” of fourteen flamingos had already landed at the feet of Lawrence.  We don’t know if the blustery winds blowing the past two days across the Northeast accounts for their premature arrival, but Valentine romantics will have even more time to enjoy this Stockade Valentine tradition.

.. . . . . . . . . . . . . ..

.. sunset, Feb. 13, 2009, photos by D.A. Giacalone ..

.. ..

The light wasn’t great for this amateur photographer to capture the event this evening, but the photos above surely hint at the joy the big pink birds bring to Valentine lovers and Stockade residents each year (thanks to two flamingo shepherds who want to remain anonymous).  We promise to take more photos tomorrow in full daylight and add them below, along with a flock of flamingo haiku and senryu. [follow-up: the tradition continues; see suns along the Mohawk, Flamingo Visitation 2011.]

To whet your appetite, here are two haiku written specifically for this year’s Stockade Flamingo event by Roberta Beary, our lawyer friend and much-honored haiku poet:

peeking out
of his daughter’s blouse
flamingo tattoo

sober now
dad uprights
the flamingo

… by Roberta Beary for f/k/a‘s Flamingo Flamboyance 2009

[Click to read the Schenectady Gazette‘s coverage of the 2008 arrival of the flamingos.]

Valentine stroll
neither lover mentions
the pink flamingos

…………. by dagosan

first warm day
she plants
the pink flamingo

.. by ed markowski – Modern Haiku (2008)

. . . . continued (Saturday morning, February 14, 2009):

.. ..

two pink flamingos
& a waitress named Sally…
summer begins

… by ed markowski

.. ..

frost on
the flamingo’s beak –
Valentine breakfast alone

… by dagosan

Snapping photos with near-frozen fingers around 8 AM this morning, I couldn’t help but feel a bit of Valentine empathy for poor old Lawrence, standing there like a prop among the flamboyantly romantic flamingos, and gazing longingly again today at the lovely clientele of Arthur’s Market.  You may recall that our Lawrence statue was originally a carving done by wood carver Samuel Anderson Robb, about 1860, for cigar-store-Indian vendor William Demuth.  In DeMuth’s 1872 catalog, Lawrence is listed as “No. 53 Indian Chief.”  Like the shy and proud Kaw-Lija (lyrics) Lawrence “never got a kiss.”  As Hank Williams sung in 1952:

Kaw-Lija, was a lonely Indian never went nowhere
His heart was set on the Indian maiden with the coal black hair
Kaw-Lija-A, just stood there and never let it show
So she could never answer “YES” or “NO”.

Click for a YouTube clip of  “Kaw-Lija” (performed by Johnny Cash and Hank Williams, Jr. at the Grand Olde Opry).  Please, don’t be an “ol’ wooden head” like Kaw-Lija and Lawrence — take a risk and let her know you care.  Maybe next Valentine will be a little less lonely, and you’ll be viewing the Stockade Flamingos hand-in-hand.

signs of summer
on the pink flamingo
an empty beer can

.. by ed markowski

visit home
the pink flamingo’s
cracked wing

………… by Roberta Beary

parting her pink robe
–daybreak

…………… by Yu Chang, from A New Resonance (1999)

— hurry: you’ve only got ’til sunset to catch the Valentine flamingos —

pink envelope
Valentine hugs and kisses
from Mom

……. by dagosan

update (Feb. 15, 2009):  The Sunday Albany Times Union has an entertaining article about the Valentine Flamingos.  See “Pink flamingos back in Stockade.”  Reporter Paul Grondahl says:

“Nobody has claimed credit for spawning this quirky urban mystery. Of course, nobody’s trying too hard to crack the case and spoil the suspension of disbelief.

“The sheer audacity and cockeyed romanticism of this random act of oddity inspired the first sing-along in front of the flamingos.”

No one told the f/k/a Gang to show up to participate or snap a few shots. Nevertheless, you can click to see a YouTube Stockade 2009 Valentine video, with photos by Mabel Leon and Beverly Elander (produced by Jennifer Wells).  Due to a technical malfunction, you won’t hear zany Stockadians singing Rogers & Hart’s “My Funny Valentine,” but will have to settle for a performance by Carly Simon and Frank Sinatra.

Another long-legged-avian Valentine tradition: The Heron’s Nest Readers’ Choice Awards (f/k/a Valentine Awards):  Managing Editor John Stevenson announced this morning (Feb. 14, 2009) the winners of the Ninth Annual Readers’ Choice Awards, for the best haiku in The Heron’s Nest of 2008 (Vol. X, which is also available in a paper edition).  Congratulations to all the winners.

Poem of the Year: Fay Aoyagi had the Poem of the Year, which can be seen here.  Runners-up honors for best poem went to Burnell Lippy, Christopher Herold, and Harriot West.

Grand Prize, Poet of the Year, went to Burnell Lippy for his consistently fine haiku. Runners-up honors went to Carolyn Hall, Christopher Herold and Gary Hotham.    Carolyn and Gary are, of course, f/k/a Honored Guest poets.  Carolyn is a perennial winner of haijin awards, and Gary seems to be more active again writing his much-admired poetry for leading haiku journals.   For a little Valentine reflection, here are a pair by each of them from The Heron’s Nest Vol. X:

enough sunrise —
a small window
in an old hotel

playground swings —
a strong wind replaces
the children

…. by Gary Hotham – The Heron’s Nest X (2008)

an eagle sighting —
the frailty
in my father’s hug

needles of rain
the talk show guest
addresses my problem

…. by Carolyn Hall – The Heron’s Nest X (2008)

.. ..

.. photo by Albany Times Union/Skip Dickstein (+ ENLARGE)

Sometimes, it’s just too easy to poke fun at the City of Schenectady and its hard-working civil servants, so we try to stick with more challenging fare.   But, we can’t always resist the temptation to share the news:

For the second time in less than a year, a City Parks Department plow has plunged through the ice of Iroquois Lake, a man-made pond in our beautiful Central Park, which is used for ice skating, fishing (largemouth bass, bluegill), and paddle-boating. The “Lake” is only 7.2 acres in size, with a mean depth of 4.3 feet.  [See “City truck falls through ice in Schenectady,” Daily Gazette, Jan. 14, 2009, with video of the retrieval; “Beware thin ice again,” Albany Times Union, Jan. 14, 2009]  The truck was clearing snow to prepare for ice skating at the pond, which has been delayed this winter because an early layer of snow slowed down ice formation.  According to the Gazette, “No one was injured in the morning accident, but the city’s pickup truck sustained significant damage as it ended up fully submerged [in 14 feet of water] at the bottom of the pond.”

The Gazette has a full account, including the explanation of Commissioner of General Services Carl Olsen, who insists that precautions were taken.  The article explains:

“Workers drilled a grid of 25 test holes to determine the ice thickness. Each hole revealed ice between 8 and 10 inches thick, enough to support the plow truck’s weight, Olsen said.

“The truck was also directed to stay away from the concrete edges, where ice thickness is less predictable. But where the truck went through about 10 to 15 yards from the nearest test hole, the ice proved to be 4 to 5 inches thick, not enough to support a pickup and plow blade.”

Lesson learned (we cautiously hope):

“Olsen said he hopes to get a lighter, older vehicle for the express purpose of plowing the lake. For now, he said they would use a ‘glorified golf cart’ with a plow blade to finish the job. The truck that tanked Tuesday had a book value of about $16,000, Olsen said; insurance may cover repairs.”

Perhaps our blawging-buddy insurance defense expert George Wallace, our favorite RiskProf Martin Grace, and Kevin Sheerin at the NY Civil Service Employment Law weblog, will help f/k/a‘s readers understand some of the issues raised when a civil servant is asked to perform such duties, and has an accident like this under circumstances where an issue of reasonable prudence arises.  Is the City’s insurance claim on thin ice?  Should heads roll?  Are bonuses or pink slips due?

.. In an editorial today titled “Put this rite of Schenectady winter to rest” (Jan. 14, 2009), the editors of the Schenectady Gazette opine that “The genius whose truck fell through the ice at Schenectady’s Central Park yesterday might be forgiven if the exact same thing hadn’t happened a year ago. But it did, of course.”  They want someone with “supreme authority” like the mayor to say “in no uncertain, terms: No more trucks on the ice.”

The editorial points out:

“Yesterday’s incident not only endangered the life of the driver, but the handful of men engaged in the subsequent rescue operation. It took them, the truck and the front-end loader sent to rescue it away from a more important task — cleaning city streets after the weekend snowstorm. If the relatively new truck that went through the ice isn’t a total loss as a result of damage from water and the salvage operation, it will surely be out of commission for weeks. The cost, even after insurance, seems likely to be in the thousands.”

And, suggests: “The city should use snowblowers or perhaps solicit trusties from the county jail for shoveling duty. But, please, no more trucks on the ice!”

In a comment at the Gazette, however, Your Editor pointed out that falling through ice repeatedly is an very old Schenectady Tradition, which we should perhaps be most reluctant to abandon.  As we explained in a post back in 2005:

One of the first examples involved trying to bridge the Mohawk River between the Stockade and Scotia [right at the end of my block of Washington Avenue]. According to “Bridging the Mohawk River” by J. Gara and J. Garver: “Work began in the winter of 1794-95 to build a wooden cable on the ice and lift it onto piers before ice-out. Unfortunately, a thaw opened the river and destroyed the work. If successful, it would have been the first long bridge in the 13 colonies.

Whether it was courage or folly, they tried again a decade later, with similar results: Gara and Garver tell us: “In 1806, construction began on the Burr Bridge again only to have more setbacks due to ice. Again, workers took advantage of the frozen river only to have their pier scaffolding destroyed when the river ice opened up in mid-winter.”

We like tradition around this little old city.  But, the Gazette just might be right: Some rites of winter should indeed be put on ice.

new ice
on the lake
the mayor walks on water

.. by dagosan

coldest day of the year
the lone skater laps
his breath

………………… by George Swede from Almost Unseen

.. orig. haiga. (orig. uncropped photo by AJG) ..

round and round with you
dancing
on thin ice

Poem: by dagosan
Photo: by Arthur Giacalone (The Gates, Central Park, NYC, 2004)

p.s. Speaking of cliches, Scott Greenfield has proven again that the Squeaky Wheel Gets the Grease.  Given his and my reputations for curmudgeonly crankiness, Scott complained yesterday that lawyer-author Mark Hermann did not send either of us a copy of his book “The Curmudgeon’s Guide to Practicing Law”, when it was unveiled in 2006, while several other clearly less-deserving blawgers (such as Turkewitz, Schaeffer and Skove) received the book for fawning review at the time.  Rather than using a statute of limitations or laches defense, as a true curmudgeon might have done, Mark wrote to Scott today, offering to send each of us remaindered copies of his book. Mark has apparently forgotten that f/k/a had pooh-poohed, in true curmudgeonly fashion, the hyperbolic promotional campaign for the book — calling it an “instant cult classic” — when it was launched.  A big, warm suitably begrudging thankyou to Mark Hermann who better not be expecting this napped-deprived Boomer to actually read and critique his Guide.

Easily bought-off Greenfield has already welcomed Mark into our Curmudgeon’s Club.  Prof. Yabut and I are, on the other hand, having second-thoughts, having never actually seen any examples of Mark Hermann being curmudgeonly.  Perhaps Mark or our readers will fill us in, should they have suitable examples.

And, getting back to folks skating on thin ice with promotional hyperbole (and you know who I mean, Kevin): I was pleased to see in Scott’s posting about Mark yesterday, that lawyer Hermann — who pens the Drug and Device Law weblog — has joined the club of straight-talking blawgers who have long warned that you can’t expect writing a weblog to bring you paying clients.

. . Bob Eckstein’s Book Presentation and Signing, Schenectady, NY . .

schenectady snowman —
bob’s book balanced
on his belly

… by dagosan (Dec. 7, 2008, for Bob Eckstein)

As we predicted last week in our post “SnowmanCity, NY“, Bob Eckstein spent a windy Sunday afternoon n Schenectady, today, for a presentation of his book “The History of the Snowman: From the Ice Age to the Flea Market” (2007), at our Central Library and a book signing at The Open Door Bookstore.   There was just a tiny crowd at the Library — only seven people other than myself, Laura Lee Linder (who helped Bob research the tale of snowmen who witnessed the 1690 Schenectady Massacre), and a representative from the Open Door.  But, we enjoyed a thirty-minute display of rare photos and historic images of snowmen — including a surprising array of magazine covers (from children’s weeklies to Playboy).  As a good author would, however, Bob failed to answer his mystery question of Who Made the First Snowman, leaving that for those who read the book.

Bob did, however, help us understand how ubiquitous snowmen have been across cultures and centuries.  In Part III of f/k/a‘s series on snowmen, we stated: “As demonstrated on our lawns, and in cartoons, comic strips, and movies, Americans have long imbued their snowmen with the same frailties, foibles and fate as humans.” Bob’s book shows that virtually every culture with snow (and perhaps a few in the tropics), have done the same thing.

The presentation inspired audience members to brave strong winds for the two-block walk from the Library to The Open Door bookstore, to purchase The History of the Snowman and have Bob autograph the book (and schmooze a bit).  They were joined by a constant stream of autograph-seekers, including the Open Door staff, who are big fans of the book.

I’m sitting here sipping coffee from my “fun and attractive” History of the Snowman Mug (thanks, Bob!), which is also available from his website, Today’s Snowman, the only online magazine devoted solely to Snowman News.

small sad face
in the puddle –
last weekend’s snowman

…………….. by david giacalone – Simply Haiku V4N3; a procession of ripples anthology (p. 18)

a little dizzy
after chemo — replacing
the snowman’s head

………………… by dagosan

You find more commentary from the f/k/a Gang and more snowmen haiku and senryu, in Part I “snowman (r)evolution”, Part II, and Part III “snobesity”, of our series on snowmen.  If you need more encouragement to seek out Bob’s book for yourself or for holiday presents, see a sneek peek and a chapter-by-chapter pictorial YouTube Preview.

winter fog
i stub my toe
on the snowman

below zero…
sparrows peck
the snowman’s nose

………… by ed markowski

“below zero” – Simply Haiku (Summer 2006, vol. 4 no. 2)

a holiday haiku stocking-stuffer from Schenectady . . .

– 2009 Schenectady Stockade Christmas Tree –

Schenectady, NY, a haiku hotbed? It surprised me, too, when I first realized that two highly-respected haiku poets –- Hilary Tann and Yu Chang — were professors at Union College, right down the street from my home in Schenectady’s Stockade Historic District. We each came to Schenectady years ago from distance places — Yu from Taiwan, Hilary from South Wales and myself from an exotic place called Washington, D.C.

Hilary and Yu readily said yes, when I asked them a year ago to help me compile a holiday collection of “real” haiku and senryu as our Holiday Gift to f/k/a‘s readers and our “neighbors” in Schenectady and around the world.

The result was “Holiday Haiku from Schenectady” (pdf.) which has two dozen poems by the three of us, and which is formatted to be printed on two sides of a letter-size sheet and made into a tri-fold brochure.

Here are the poems for those who would rather scroll than click.  No matter which holidays you celebrate during this month of special days, may they be joyous for you and all your loved ones.

.. ..

wintry mix
we make a snow buddha
for Santa

– dag

[orig. haiga]

December rain
a starlet
sheds her tears

parting clouds
she checks the Christmas lights
one by one

red envelopes
the sound
of children’s laughter

three generations
peering down a gopher hole
winter solstice

Christmas snow
my father’s footsteps
bigger than mine

………… by Yu Chang

red bows decorate
the ‘Closed for the Season’
sign

Christmas Eve
we share the same
wrapping paper

replacing
the paperweight –
another snowstorm

Christmas service
the old carols
with no back-beat

sitting
where I sat as a child
I wait out the storm

Christmas lights
my eye is drawn
to the house with none

………………. by Hilary Tann

setting up the creche –
the Baby’s name
uttered over and over

married a decade
she hides
the mistletoe

Nana serves
Grandma’s recipes –
Christmas Eve calamari

warm yule
the ice-fishing hole
mostly hole

empty cookie tin —
letting out last year’s
santa suit

frontdoor
to curb —
pine needles and tinsel

……………………….. by David Giacalone

New Year’s eve
a balloon
tied to an empty chair

new year’s day
a squirrel emerges
from the dumpster

……………………….. yc

twelfth night
a trail of pine needles
down the garden path

– ht

Boxing Day drizzle —
the inflatable snowman
keeps smiling

gray sky
all the way home
from grandma’s house

New Year’s Eve
sleet and snow–
the old man takes baby steps

……………. dag

…. from the brochure “Holiday Haiku from Schenectady”

– click for more Christmas Season Haiku by f/k/a‘s Honored Guest Poets –

– find Schenectady holiday spirit in the Gazette gallery of Stockade Doors –