Portfolio Introduction
May 4th, 2012
On Islam:
Having grown up with Catholicism as the name brand religion of my culture, I had grown comfortable with the idea of religion as a form of oppression. The centrality of self-denial and mea culpas to this form of religion made me realize at a young age that I was well suited to atheism. My disdain for religion was reinforced by the hatred and intolerance that I associate with the very vocal anti-gay, anti-contraception, Creationist groups in the United States, as well as historical events like the Crusades, or the rise of the Ku Klux Klan. I had, in my infinite teenage wisdom, divided Christians into two categories: fundamentalist, and delusional. That was that. I saw what I had told myself was the truth about religion, and no amount of “Jesus loves you” could bring me back.
Then I met Islam. No, this is not a story of conversion in the usual sense. I am not a Muslim, nor do I purport to be in search of God. I met Islam, like many Americans, in the upheaval that was September 11, 2001. Like any good fifth grader, I remembered that Islam was a one of the “Big Three” monotheistic religions and that the central beliefs were called the Five Pillars. Beyond that, I imagined it was Christianity for the Middle East. If not for the reaction 9/11 provoked, I doubt I would have ever developed a sincere interest in religion. The huge backlash against Islam, that we are unfortunately still experiencing today, provoked such disgust for America in me that I felt I had no choice but to prove to myself that Islam was beautiful. Typical rooting-for-the-underdog syndrome, I know.
I understood hatred to be a symptom of misunderstanding and miscommunication, and so set out to engage with Muslims and Islam. What I found was love, not hate. Unlike with Christianity, I was removed enough from Islam to appreciate its message, without the years of personal experience tainting every concept. Backwards as it may seem, Islam has helped me grow more tolerant of Christianity, and religion in general. I can now see beyond the idea of religion as the “opiate of the masses,” and have opened myself up to the understanding of some of my personal beliefs and actions as being spiritual in nature.
The seven pieces that I have produced over the course of the semester have been my attempt at continuing this exploration of Islam on a personal level. Each one of these pieces is a distinct part of the process of internalizing an understanding of Islam. Though in some ways specific to the material being addressed, the ideas underlying these responses represent a complete survey of my developing perception of Islam and spirituality.
God is love. If there is anything I am taking from this class it is this idea. Somehow, I had managed to gloss over this in my previous attempts to understand Islam. I knew that love of God was the driving force behind many of the miracles of poetry and art produced by Muslims, and that God’s love is something man at once has and must seek. Yet, the idea that I could most readily connect with was the one I had ignored. God is love. With this simple statement it becomes easier to understand the why behind not only religion, but human behavior as well. We’re not crazy; we’re in love. Somehow that makes it better. Or more beautiful, at least.
On Art:
I had never thought to merge the idea I have of art with the monolithic concept that is Harvard for me. Much like Professor Asani’s concept of Islam vs. islam, art and Harvard do not seem compatible, yet I know that art is the lubricant that eases the paths of harvard life. Whether or not their work is put on exhibit, students are creating something personal, something to give their lives meaning. We are all working together, even in an environment as individualistic as Harvard.
This new understanding of art as a shared domain has been a long time coming. For as long as I can remember, I have had trouble sharing any physical manifestation of my inner self. I get great satisfaction from working with my hands, but have shied away from sharing the end product with anyone but my closest friends. I am sure that any psychiatrist would trace this need for privacy to a fear of rejection, and perhaps that is true. I however, have continued to justify this by telling myself that my art is of such rough construction that it can only have meaning to me.
Given this, my decision to take this class seemed somewhat unnatural, despite my love for the subject. Faced with this challenge, I figured that I would either get inspired or would have to fake it. Thankfully, the structure of the responses was such that I was able to latch onto the images and ideas that resonated with me, and disregard the rest. Yet despite this flexibility, I continued to find myself making these responses and waiting to post them online until there was absolutely no alternative. I could not let go.
It was not until we were asked to contribute to an art exhibit on campus that I could bring myself to let go of my work (under the guise of helping another project of course). The experience of displaying my work, even to the very limited audience of my classmates, has made me appreciate the release that this provides. If making art is cathartic, the invasiveness of putting it on display is even more so. Although I acknowledge that I will continue to struggle with this part of the process, I have realized that not sharing something produced with sincerity is a disservice both to the artist and to anyone who may benefit from viewing it.
With that, I leave you my portfolio. My motivations for creating each is described, but ultimately the analysis is up to you.
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