New Jersey….Capital of the McMansion
I meant to write about this yesterday (but forgot)…but with 40 minutes to go before leaving for Philadelphia, I figured I’d mention it before I forget.
I have concluded that New Jersey (at least this part of NJ) is the land of the McMansion. It’s a fascinating thing. This area seems to have been developed in 4 phases. There were the 1920’s style areas (like Sleepy Hollow) with charming old houses on reasonably sized lots. Then there were these 1950’s split-level ranch areas (also on reasonably sized lots).
In the 1960’s these modern/contemporary houses started sprouting up. But, possibly as a result of the previous development bursts, these houses are sporadically thrown in among the other neighborhoods (versus having entire neighborhoods with identical Mike Brady houses).
Then, the worst development era is happening now: the McMansion. I don’t understand this phenomenon. People are building these enormous cookie-cutter houses all over the place down here. Occasionally you’ll see one built next to a 1950’s split level, but most of them are being built in these developments. The houses are enormous…at least 3,000 square feet with 4 car garages, palladian windows and excessive landscaping. I can’t imagine that these houses sell for less than $1-2 million…at least! Yet, they’re all the same…and built in areas behind strip malls and such. I’m guessing it must be a nouveau riche thing. I mean, if you have that much money to built an obscene house like that…why not build it overlooking the ocean, or a lake? And with that much money – why not customize the house so it doesn’t appear like all the others? They remind me of the homes you see on MTV’s “Cribs”…where newly rich basketball players buy a McMansion and the inside is all white and sterile. B-O-R-I-N-G !!!
Anyway, that’s just my observation. I’m sure the whole state isn’t like that…I hope.
Oh, and for all of you that think you’ve had a bad blind date…I’m sure it pales in comparison to the one my friend Melody went on in Manhattan this spring. I won’t provide all of the details, but let’s just say he arrived 1.5 hours late, brought her to a fast food stall for lunch, left her on a street corner for 15-30 minutes so he could (presumably) conduct a drug deal, commented on her ample bosom, then asked her about the size of another more private female body part (all within hearing distance of other pedestrians), and then dripped ice cream all over clothes. Poor Melody. I have faith that there are better men out there for her – and hopefully they don’t live in a McMansion.
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why in the world did melody put up with any of that? why did she wait 1.5 hours?
Usually the folks who buy those houses in those developments aren’t as “rich” as you probably think they are. In my experience, really rich people (even the new monied folks) wouldn’t be caught dead in those cookie cutter developments. I think that those homes are mostly bought by people who are mortgaged to within a inch of their lives in a very Keeping Up With The Jones/New American Ideal sort of way.
Of course there are exceptions to these rules.
Keep enjoying your vacation!
And, Melanie was very well behaved on her date. The fact that she even waited around that long shows greater fortitude then I would ever have.
YEAH!!! ADVENTURE, AN ENDURING LOVE….
ALMOST SOUNDS LIKE THOSE “HISTORICAL” ROMANCES MY MOM READS.
OF COURSE MY MOM WOULD HAVE PUNCHED A GUY IF HE TREATED HER LIKE THAT. WHAT SELF CONTROL MELODY HAS…
MAYBE THAT’S WHY MY DAD BUYS MOM CARDS AND UNDERLINES WORDS…
HI everyone! First I wanted to say to Karl, THANK YOU FOR COMING TO SEE ME!! I had a blast and hopefully next time we can do something we actually talked about doing. Secondly, telling Karl about my date I still can’t believe I was that STUPID to wait around for the guy and then when he started asking such nice questions why I didn’t kick him and walk away. The only excuse for myself was that I kept hoping the guy that I spoke with on the phone would show up. Oh well, live and learn as they say.
Thanks again Karl for coming down.
Melody
2 VERY good reasons to leave NJ:
crappy architecture and crappy guys! why do you think so many people decamp to new york or philly (i shouldnt rag on NJ so much, but so many of the bad stereotypes do live up to themselves)?
see http://www.njguido.com to see for yourself
and honey, dont ever wait more than 20 minutes for a stranger-and the comment given about your cleavage deserved to be answered with a swift kick to the ‘nads.
I have relatives in Bernardsville who live in one of the 1920s houses and when they drive through the Jewrsey countryside, they almost weep for the big old estates that are being broken up for these plastic, snap-together monstrosities, almost always placed too close together and in colors that clash. They’re the SUVs of the housing market and that ISN’T a compliment.
ummmm…who is this Under_ling person????
The text was good, but i stil cant find the play ipdates. looking for it dude.
A heap of wheat, says the Song of Songs
but I’ve never seen wheat in a pile 🙂
did you like it?
Nice one, but what about der weg ? anywya, congrats from me.