I am the eggman, they are the eggman – I am the walrus…Goo Goo Goo Joob

Trust me…I will stop talking about this beard very soon. But it’s getting much more attention than the last time I grew one (then again, it could be because I won’t shut up about it). Anyway, this brief paragraph about it is just a segue into another subject….so please “bear” with me (no pun intended).

I’ve been told a few times in person and on-line lately that I am what the gay community considers an otter (because I’m hairy, but not big enough to be a bear):

I can accept that since they seem cute enough. But I just find it so interesting that we all try to find labels for each other (see how quickly the subject has changed from my beard to labeling people? I told you I wouldn’t focus on facial hair).

I think we all are guilty of labeling people. Actually, I don’t think guilty is the best word because I don’t necessarily think there is anything wrong with labeling. I mean, if stuff we bought in the store wasn’t labeled, you’d never know what you’re buying. So, in that sense, labeling people makes sense, too. It just seems logical that you’re more likely to get along with somebody if you have something in common or share similar interests. And what better way to expedite that than through labeling?

Whether it’s obvious or not – we use labeling on a daily basis (directly or indirectly). And I don’t see a problem with it unless it’s used in a negative way (like to hurt an individual or a group of people). I’m also more than happy to label myself, too.

So, I shall embrace my otter status (how could I not?….how adorable is that little otter in the picture?)

And speaking of labels, I think it’s safe for me label myself something else…


I was watching VH-1 Classics over the weekend and they were playing music from the 90’s….THE 90’S!!!!!! When we first got this channel a few years ago it was predominantly early 80’s music (with occasional 60’s and 70’s thrown in). That made sense and I loved it. I mean, in high school (during the 80’s) I would occasionally listen to the “oldies” radio station which played 50’s and 60’s music. I think it’s reasonable to consider oldies or classics to be music that existed at least 2 decades earlier. By this definition, it made sense that the 90’s would start including 70’s music with their 50’s and 60’s rotation and that the naughts (or whatever we’re calling this decade) would start to include 80’s music (hence VH-1 Classics).

But for VH-1 Classics to be playing music from just 10 years ago? That’s absurd. There is no excuse for Mudhoney on VH-1 Classics until at least 2010 (even then…Mudhoney?).

OH! And today is my 9-year anniversary with Matt!!! We’re going out for a romantic dinner in Beacon Hill tonight, and then the real celebration begins next week in Provinctown. Tomorrow I think I might post on this website the text of the personal ad that brought us together back in 1995. Happy Anniversary, BabyHed!


  1. Comment by Erica on July 20, 2004 12:31 pm

    Happy Anniversay, Karl & Matt!!
    *does song & dance*

    … and now I will rant about labels :D. I think I feel the same way as you do about them, that they’re necessary and useful. But also, that overlabelling can suck. One thing I always get mad at is being classified as “femme” for physical things I can’t control, like body shape, and then just for wearing my hair long and liking skirts now & then. I don’t *feel* particularly “femme.” I don’t identify with the word in any way. I’m not “butch” either but when I’m in the queer comunity, there are some subsets who just don’t know how to handle you if you’re not one or the other. If “femme” was *just* about describing a physical type, that would be fine to me, but there’s all sorts of other baggage that comes with it, expectations about behavior and what’s important to you, and what roles you take on in a relationship or social group, that bug me.


    Happy Anniversay, again 😀

  2. Comment by Jimi Sweet on July 20, 2004 2:49 pm

    Otters are adorable!

  3. Comment by Underling on July 20, 2004 3:39 pm

    Congrats on nine years!

    I think otters are cute…but I’m not sure I like the name when it is applied to me. Apparently, I, too, am an otter. I’m not sure how I feel about it…but it sure beats “Cub”.

  4. Comment by Robert on July 20, 2004 3:43 pm

    Otters are cute!!! And a very happy anniversary to you both.. 9 years is definately something to be happy about!!! It’s hard work I’m sure. No? Does it seem like 9 years??

    Alec and I are going on our 6th and now a days, I don’t even remember what we did 2 weekends ago.

    FYI. A hairy Asian I believe is labeled as a panda bear! heh!

  5. Comment by Will on July 20, 2004 10:20 pm

    Congratulations Matt and Karl! Nine years and still going strong. With such a strong start, you otter have a long and happy life together.


  6. Comment by chris on July 21, 2004 2:22 pm

    i read the definitions from the bear book, and if im not mistaken its body size that matters most. bears are the biggest/hairiest, with cubs being smaller guys but just as hairy, and otters being the slim guy with fur.
    i think.

    and a happy nine-r to youz both! keep pn going strong!

  7. Comment by Mery on July 23, 2005 2:11 am

    The text was good, but i stil cant find the play ipdates. looking for it dude.

  8. Comment by Peter Jackson on July 23, 2005 9:01 pm

    A heap of wheat, says the Song of Songs
    but I’ve never seen wheat in a pile 🙂
    did you like it?

  9. Comment by Richard Davis on July 24, 2005 10:42 pm

    Nice one, but what about der weg ? anywya, congrats from me.

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