The Mystery of the Migrating Ailment
I’m starting to get annoyed. I’ve had some sort of sore throat since returning from Washington, DC nearly two weeks ago. It started the day after my return to Boston and I attributed it to the flight (I always manage to come down with something when I fly).
The original symptoms were simply a discomfortable dry throat. It was in the top back of my mouth/throat, technically, and more focused on the left side. It then moved down into my throat – centrally located.
Things improved a bit over the weekend, but I suspect going to two bars on Saturday night and staying up late didn’t help (despite the fact that bars are smoke-free, you still have to yell to communicate).
Now there is no pain associated with swallowing (keep it clean, people), but my jaw literally hurts. Both sides of my neck have swollen glands to the point that I think you can see it. Maybe not, but I sure as hell can feel it. It hurts to turn my head or open my mouth to speak. But not in a sore throat kind of way – but in a pulled muscle sort of way. It’s odd.
I have no other symptoms: no runny nose, no cold, no other aches or fevers.
I know, I know, I suspect that Karyn and Matt are preparing to post a nasty comment already that I need to get my ass to the doctor (Karyn) or medicate the pain (Matt). Well, after nearly two weeks of suffering, I’ve finally made an appointment for tomorrow (Friday). Of course, as is always the case with me, by the time I get into the doctor, the symptoms will have disappeared.
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MAYBE YOU HAVE THE MUMPS, OR BUMPS IN THE NECK.
MAYBE YOU HAVE THE AVIAN FLU. THE PLANE COULD HAVE BEEN CARRYING A CHINEESE PASSENGER WHO FLEW INTO NEW YORK, AND THEN WAS FLYING TO DC.
THEY STILL HAD SOME CHICKEN URINE THAT WAS INFECTED, ON THEIR HANDS. THEY USED THE BATHROOM AND DIDN’T WASH THEIR HAND. THEN YOU GOT IT ON YOUR HANDS…..
OR MAYBE NOT………..
RADIO HOST: GAY ADOPTION IS CHILD ABUSE
OIA Newsdesk
NEW YORK – Allowing gay couples to adopt is nothing short of state-sanctioned child abuse, according to radio host Janet Parshall.
During a discussion about the implications of the film “Brokeback Mountain” on CNN’s “Larry King Live,” Parshall referred to the adoption of children by same-sex couples as “state-sanctioned child abuse,” and implied that the “lifestyle” of Matthew Shepard was partly to blame for his 1998 murder.
Opining on gay marriage, Parshall argued that marriage is defined as a union between one man and one woman, and that “everything else is a fraudulent misrepresentation.”
She then asserted that allowing a gay couple to adopt constituted “state-sanctioned child abuse because you’ve purposely taken away either a momma or a daddy, and mom and dad are both necessary in a child’s life.”
Speaking about Shepard’s death — the result of severe injuries sustained during a violent beating at the hands of two men who, purportedly claiming to be gay, lured him from a campus bar at the University of Wyoming — Parshall first asserted that she was not offering “a justification of what happened, because it was wrong, wrong, and wrong.” She did suggest, however, that “there’s a lot of questions about his [Shepard’s] background,” and asked, “[W]as he looking for trouble in all the wrong places?”
Parshall also told King that she was not at all surprised at the “buzz” surrounding “Brokeback Mountain” because “what we’re witnessing, Larry, is the homosexualizing of America.”
According to an article in American Outlook, the quarterly magazine of the conservative Hudson Institute, the “Janet Parshall’s America” radio show reaches 3.5 million listeners five days a week. The show is syndicated by Salem Radio Network.
The Jan. 17 edition of CNN’s “Larry King Live” featured a discussion that included Parshall, actor Chad Allen, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary president R. Albert Mohler Jr., and former Mayor of Casper, Wyo., (Shepard’s hometown) Guy Padgett III. [1/20/06]
Um, David?
This has to do with a sore throat how? LOL
Hmm, you’re bound to come down with something if you always manage to go down on someone when you fly. Err, something.
Nothing, but she sounds like an idiot, aka, Dr. Laura wannabe, and I thought people would be interested in it.
My Dear Karl…since your mom is not around to keep an eye on you. I guess I need to step in.. As your surrogate mommy i’m telling you to go to the Dr’s asap. It sounds like Strep… and do not kiss anyone!
I think you have STREP. You’ve probably exposed a zillion people! Glad you’re going to the doctor!
hmmm:::::john and i have been exchanging sore throats since youve been in DC i think. but, unlike your symptoms, its difficult and painful for me to swallow, and i have LOADS of gunky green-brown sludge oozing out of my gullet. maybe it was something you caught here? possible?
I have had a slight sore throat and a headache for the past couple of days. Did you infect me with some form of contagion? Is this what happens when you finally deem me worthy enough of some Karl time???
It doesn’t sound like anything a little whiskey and tobacco couldn’t cure. Lookin good today, BTW, maybe this illness agrees with you, or does it just turn you into an asshole that won’t hold the elevator. 🙂
OMG – Veselka Slut! I’m so sorry. When was this?
I’m completely oblivious to the world around me. Ask my ex…he was determined I’d get hit by a car one day as I aimlessly cross roads without looking.
Was this after lunch? Now you can see why I was so useless with the collapsing old man the other day!
But thanks for the compliment on my sickly appearance! I guess I should be sick more often.
It makes you look thinner and more intelligent. Women in the middle ages used to take tiny pinches of cyanide to make themselves look sickly like their 9 months prego and about to give birth, because the fashion model of Italy circa 1200 was Mary, therefore I think you should start eating cyanide.
Wow – just because I don’t hold an elevator for you now you want to poison me?
Wait – and are you saying I normally look stupid and fat since I looked “thinner and more intelligent” today?
No, I’ve decided to be magnaminous and forgive you. I really had more of a seppuku thing in mind anyway, much easier for me. But don’t let it happen again, or else. . . If you’re better by the time you get to the doctors just make something else up.
Karl, for crissakes, take some motrin (that’s my inner Matt) and go to the doctor (that’s just me) before this mutating throat illness turns you into a total raving jackass. Get thee to the doctor! I love you –