She’s a Screamer

Last night I discovered that my new upstairs neighbor (the loud one) is a screamer during sex. Oh yes, she makes it quite clear to all those around her that she’s climaxing.

I, unfortunately, was around her last night. Well, I was home…and considering the paper thin floor separating us, that essentially puts me in the same room as her and her boyfriend as they make love.

At 7:59PM yesterday I started hearing slight female moans while watching TV. They began so rythmically that I thought it was on TV. But they started getting louder so I muted the TV for a moment and realized the sound was actually coming from upstairs.

I immediately un-muted the TV and increased the volume.

But she, too, got louder.

For the next 5 minutes or so I heard her moan, groan and scream in various manners before hearing him start “uhhh-uhhhh”-ing to what I can only assume was his orgasm. Then it all stopped and the noise went back to her normal loud thudding and banging (presumably from walking and, well, drilling and bowling).

Now I feel all dirty.


  1. Comment by Lise on December 20, 2006 11:25 am

    That’s hot! What you should have done is just start mimicing her really loudly also. Maybe add some whip and paddle noises just to freak them out more. That’s the only way to get the point across. Not that it sounds like these inconsiderate boobs would care.

  2. Comment by Mark on December 20, 2006 12:37 pm

    I agree. Make sure that your sex is loud as well. Gay it up a bit. You can do it!

  3. Comment by J.P. on December 20, 2006 1:05 pm

    I agree with the others. Make your sex loud, gay it up a lot and call Randy “daddy”. If you can do it while they’re doing it, it’ll be just like a group thing.

  4. Comment by JoeyBagODonuts on December 20, 2006 2:18 pm

    Next time tape it…..wait an hour…..then put it on the stereo, speakers & volume up!!

    Bet you don’t hear them again……

  5. Comment by BR on December 20, 2006 2:40 pm

    I had a place in college where this happened … we’d crank up the song “Doin’ It” by LL Cool J for a bit, and magically, they’d shut up. Feel free to broomhandle the ceiling, by the way; no one would blame you for that.

    Oh, and I like the taping and replaying scheme, also.

    Now, hearing sex between strangers is pretty bad, but nothing is worse than overhearing someone you know. Eew.

  6. Comment by Will on December 20, 2006 3:24 pm

    How disagreeable–what if you want to give a dinner party or have family over? On the other hand, if they start up some night when you have the guys over, I’d suggest a huge round of applause and cries of “Sounds like great sex!” “How about putting that on cam?” etc. just after climax.

  7. Comment by christine on December 20, 2006 10:35 pm

    you should applaud and scream for an encore, like you’re at a rock show.

    When my husband and i were first married we lived on Charlesgate east, and our building was a big U shape. We lived inside the U. it was summer. everyone had their windows open so you could smell what was cooking for dinner in every apartment, and hear students practicing trumpet and cello, and of course, sexing it up like crazed weasels.

    my best friend and his wife came for dinner one night, and it was about 6pm when someone above and across from us started rutting like rhinos. she was screaming and begging for more, he was grunting. so my friend gregg started cheering “Make her cum! make her cum!”

    and the guy screamed “Shut up! I’m trying to concentrate!”

    and 100 people laughed.

    I don’t know that they ever finished. But we had some good times that summer in that U shaped apartment building.

  8. Comment by Six on December 21, 2006 10:29 am

    Wow, a whole 5 minutes? Her boyfriend is Mr. Stamina, huh?

  9. Comment by karyn on December 21, 2006 11:58 am

    Joey- that is hilarious.
    Karl – that is sick. I feel bad for you! Yikes!

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