Monthly Archives: June 2005

New Element Discovered

A major research institution has just announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named "Governmentium." Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 deputy assistant neutrons, giving … Continue reading

Posted in Blogging | 30 Comments

Kleptomaniac in the Kremlin

  Robert Kraft (L) and Rupert Murdoch watched President Vladimir Putin try on the Patriots ring before he pocketed it. (Kommersant Photo / Dmitry Azarov     Slick move, Vlad…     The owner of the New England Patriots, Robert … Continue reading

Posted in Serious News | 31 Comments

The Fire Next Time

As the debacles mount and desperation begins to spread in the administration, the Dowbrigade is growing increasingly nervous over the lengths to which the Bush junta is willing to go to perpetuate their endangered vision of the the future of … Continue reading

Posted in Prose Screeds | 44 Comments

Dirty Story

ALBANY – A 45-year-old Gardiner, Maine, man was arrested Sunday on criminal trespass charges after a teenage girl found him staring at her from below an outhouse seat, police said. Police pulled Gary Moody from the waste tank under a … Continue reading

Posted in Wacky News | 32 Comments

Comic of the Day

Posted in Comics | 27 Comments

Best Quote of the Day?

”You will hear people more foolish than wicked say ‘Our country, right or wrong,’ but that is a false patriotism and bad Americanism. When our country is wrong she is worse than other countries when they are wrong, for she … Continue reading

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Zombie Dogs in Pittsburg

Our old college buddy and ethnobotanist Wade Davis wrote the book on Haitian Zombie Powder (The Serpent and the Rainbow). Now, scientists in Pittsburg, of all places, have peeled back the veil of death and refused to let dead dogs … Continue reading

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Thinking Like a Machine

In the 1960’s John C. Lilly pioneered the concept of the human brain as an organic computer, executing set behavioral progrrams when presented with certain situations. In his seminal paper, "Programming and Metaprogramming in the Human Biocomputer", he asserted that … Continue reading

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Legless Lineman Plays Varsity Football

Skirting that fine line between inspirational and sick…. VALENCIA CA – It is a story of strength, courage and determination in Valencia. A 15-year-old boy overcomes incredible odds, to play football. Like other athletic 15-year-olds, Chris Gonzalez is getting himself … Continue reading

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Snapple, Crack and Poop

Giant Red Erection Wilts in Big Apple Sun "What was unsettling was that the fluid just kept coming," Stuart Claxton of the Guinness Book of World Records told the Daily News. A 25-foot, 17-ton ice pop made of the supposed … Continue reading

Posted in Wacky News | 2 Comments

Solar Sail Lost in Space

PASADENA, California — The Cosmos solar sail is missing shortly after its launch from a Russian nuclear submarine. The $4 million Cosmos 1 spacecraft blasted off atop a converted Russian missile at approximately 12:46 p.m. Pacific Time on Tuesday, but … Continue reading

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Graffiti Archeology – Revealing the Past

From top left: Jim Stubchaer (1949); Bill Volkmer (1955); Martin Schall (2000); Graffiti V?rit? (2002); Ladytribe (2003); Amy McKenzie (March 2004, May 2004); Aaron Bocanegra (July 2004); Cassidy Curtis (August 2004). A Tunnel’s Tale A historical photo of the Belmont … Continue reading

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