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~ Archive for May, 2019 ~

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什麼東西才能稱其為奇妙呢?那就是我們無法了解的東西。而什麼東西才是我們真正想要的呢?就是我們無法得到的東西。
—— 大仲馬 《基督山伯爵》

COLLEGE LIGHTBULB JOKES

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How many Princeton students does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two—one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.
How many Brown students does it take to change a lightbulb?
Eleven—one to change the lightbulb and ten to share the experience.
How many Dartmouth students does it take to change a lightbulb?
None—Hanover doesn’t have electricity.
How many Cornell students does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two–One to change the lightbulb and one to crack under the pressure.
How many Penn students does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one, but he gets six credits for it.
How many Columbia students does it take to change a lightbulb?
Seventy-six–one to change the lightbulb, fifty to protest the lightbulb’s right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter-protest.
How many Yale students does it take to change a lightbulb?
None–New Haven looks better in the dark.
How many Harvard students does it take to change a lightbulb? One–he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.

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早上起來馬上意識到:餓醒的。

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人類都可以上太空登月球了,為什麼我還要洗碗?(廚房亂象)

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“生中有这么一些短暂的瞬间,有这么一些感情… …对这些,只能点到为止,就不要刨根问底了吧。”
–屠格涅夫《贵族之家》

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我们人人都曾有过纯真,只是长大后就丧失了。因此,现在的我们才不屑的称这种想法为”天真”,用着一种酸溜溜的口气。
——E·B·怀特 《夏洛的网》

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去年,柏林邵宾纳剧院携易卜生名剧《人民公敌》到中国巡演,受到中国戏剧迷欢迎。然而在北京演出三场后,原计划在南京的另两场演出被临时取消。原因是剧中与观众互动的部分突破了中国言论管制的红线。网民评论:“易卜生百来年前的剧如今在中国演出居然都敏感了辱华了不让演了,这不是魔幻现实什么是魔幻现实……也说明易卜生不愧是伟大的剧作家,能刺痛一百三十多年后的统治者,这就是经典的生命力吧。”

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有人说:肯示弱的时候,才是对自己内心之强大有了自信的时候。

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昨天給一對新婚夫婦做證婚人,宴席上發現新郎和新娘第一次見面就求婚得逞。當然,兩人網上來回視頻已經幾個月了。據美麗的新娘吐露,開始時她並沒有鬆口願意交往,但架不住新郎常常和她視頻從半夜三更到早上上班之前,口若懸河,不讓她睡覺,甜言蜜語,終於把她愛情的防盜門撬開。看來,「女人耳根軟」的確不假。

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俺家的松下牌面包机每次生产一个面包🍞需要四个小时,中间过程还得加核桃仁和黑berry,想出门都不行。外面大把的灿烂阳光和初夏的鸟语花香对守着面包机的me来说恍若世外桃源。窗外的景色果然是:日长篱落无人过,唯有蜻蜓蛱蝶飞。(宋·范成大)

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