I want to carry something that would help me remember my baby. Its birthday (due date) is Sept 16. Birthstone for Sept is Sapphire. A week after I had my DC surgery, I ordered a handmade necklace with a Sapphire stone from Kansas, thinking I would get to wear it wherever I go…Ironically, I forgot my skin is sensitive to metal. Upon I put the necklace on, I developed rash all over my chest. It became even worse after numerous of night sweat (typical symptom after child birth). This happened just like how some people explain the cause of miscarriage, that is your body would simply reject / discontinue the development when ‘it’ is not meant to be….

I refused to just put this necklace aside. The color of the Sapphire stone is so beautiful that just like how this baby ‘shines’ in my heart. Thanks to my dad who left me zillions of plastic wire ties when he last visited me… I then took the Sapphire stone pendant from the necklace, tied it to my Alex & Ani bangle bracelet with my husband’s initial on it. I cut the tail of the tie and burnt the edge a little bit just to polish the end. It is far less than perfect from the professional jewelry maker (plus I ain’t a good hand crafter at all). But at least, I get to wear it now.

At least, it’s something I can physically hold on….

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