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JWZ beats up Design Patterns

This is just hilarious:

I just read
Understanding Object Oriented Programming
and it’s a hoot —

Every if and every switch should be viewed as a lost opportunity for
dynamic polymorphism.

If you get the chance I suggest you read all the comments people made to JWZ on
this topic. This comment is an absolute classic:

You know, when you have a program that does something really cool, and you wrote it from scratch, and it took a significant part of your life, you grow fond of it. When it’s finished, it feels like some kind of amorphous sculpture that you’ve created. It has an abstract shape in your head that’s completely independent of its actual purpose. Elegant, simple, beautiful.

Then, only a year later, after making dozens of pragmatic alterations to suit the people who use it, not only has your Venus-de-Milo lost both arms, she also has a giraffe’s head sticking out of her chest and a cherubic penis that squirts colored water into a plastic bucket. The romance has become so painful that each day you struggle with an overwhelming urge to smash the fucking thing to pieces with a hammer.

Go read it

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