Trufflers
Apparently, walking around Vienna at night alone makes me a “mark” not for muggings, but for wily women.
The first lady approached me speaking rapidly in German and put out her
hand to shake. Trying not to be rude (maybe I am a mark after
all), I “shook” her hand. But then she wouldn’t let go. I
pried my hand loose and excused myself.
The next night, I passed a guy and two girls walking down
Mariahilferstrasse in the same direction as me. The guy was
clowning around a bit and waved to me. I nodded and walked
on. He then tried to get my attention but I tried to ignore him. They definitely didn’t look dangerous, just… I didn’t want to be bothered. Finally,
he became impossible to ignore, and I turned around. He came up
to me and said something I couldn’t understand. Then one of the
girls walked up to me and began to totally grind against me. I
was like, thanks, but I saw this in the Munich train station 20 years
ago when a lady “bumped into” Dad and went for his privates and his
back pocket at the same time. My hand went to my back pocket and
sure enough, a few seconds later there was her hand on mine. “You
want to go disco?” she asked. No thanks, I am going to sleep.