A Year of Extremes
Back in 2003, while Matt was suffering through the worst of his depression, I couldn’t help but think that was the worst year of my life. But then 2004 came and Matt and I broke up. Once again, I thought that 2004 might have just trumped 2003 in the record books for worst year.
Now it’s 2005. And this year has just been one long roller-coaster ride. At times, I want it to last forever, at others, I can’t wait for my chance to get off the ride. On the plus side, these past 12 months have afforded me the opportunity to make new friends and grow closer to existing ones. I’ve started traveling again (New York City, Provincetown, Chicago, White Mountains, Minneapolis, Washington DC, Paris) and have realized that I thoroughly enjoy the freedom of living on my own (something I’d thought I’d dread).
However, within the past 12 months, I’ve also bawled my eyes out for three separate occasions. First, Matt and I ended a nearly 10 year relationship. That night still sticks in my mind as the worst night of my life.
Then in March, my good friend, Regina, died of breast cancer. I had to watch her wither away over the course of 9 months until the very last day when I was at the hospital with her when she died.
Finally, I got “the call” from my brother yesterday that my niece was rapidly geting worse. Her liver ceased functioning and it was expected that she would be dead within 24 hours. If she didn’t die overnight, they were going to pull the plugs this morning between 9 and 10 AM. So, I bawled at work, left early, and went to the hospital, where I stayed until 8PM. It was a long, long night (even longer from my brother and sister-in-law, I’m sure).
So, as of this blog posting, she’s still alive. But by the time people read this, within the hour, and less than one week shy of her 3rd birthday, she will be dead. (ok – here come the tears again).
The plan is for Paul, Heidi and their pastor to be there when she passes away. Then they’ll call me and I’ll take the subway there and then drive them back home (they’ll be in no state to drive…hell, I probably won’t be, either). My parents are going to also drive to their house and bring their two other children home. Then, Paul and Heidi will have to break the news to their 6 and 7 year olds. I suspect the tears will be flowing throughout the weekend.
Thank you, everybody, for your kind comments and thoughts over the past few months as I’ve written about this. I can’t even tell you how much it’s meant to me.
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The tears are already flowing. I’m so sad for your family Karl. It is so cruel that good people have to endure such heartbreak. As ever, I’m here.
Much love to you –
I love you beautiful friend. I am sorry that life brings cruelty as well as joy. If I could make it all go away I would. But I can’t so I will just silently hold your hand today and try to be there for you in my own humble way. Be Strong,
Oh, Karl….
Chad and I will keep you and your family in our prayers. But hey, Heather has known so much love from all of you , she is going to be one hell of a guardian angel.
And in the immortal words of Patti Labelle…
“Love Never Dies”
Karl… I was so sorry to read this today. My heart goes out to all your family. You all are in my prayers. Take care friend. I’m always here for you.
Karl… I was so sorry to read this today. My heart goes out to all your family. You all are in my prayers. Take care friend. I’m always here for you.
Oh Karl, I’m so sorry. If you need anything, please don’t hesistate to ask. I’ll be there. You and your family will be in my thoughts.
Heather will always, always be with you all… Take care Karl.
My thoughts are with you during this horrible time. Take care, Karl.
Reading this just felt like a gut punch. I am so very sorry, Karl. Please take care of yourself and of your family. I don’t have to say “always remember Heather” because you always will–true love is forever. At the very least, her suffering is over and she’s in a better place.
All my best to you, Paul and Heidi.
Karl..what can be said that hasnt been said above? My thoughts are with you and your family at this most difficult time. Be strong….Doug.
Big hugs. I’m very sorry. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Karl, I’m so sorry to read this. I’m thinking of you and your whole family.
Words can not possibly express, the sadness inside. You are surrounded by love, now and always.
“every time a bell rings, an Angel gets her wings.”
Karl, I know we’ve talked a couple of times — but I am so very sorry. If there is anything I can do, you know where I am. Hang in there. Give Heidi, Paul, your mom and your dad a hug from me.