Hey there, Buddy. Do you wanna’ ride?

So there I was walking from the train station to the office this morning (normally about a 10 minute walk) when a car stopped at an intersection honked its horn at me and asked that question (I may have the exact wording wrong).


…So I jumped in.


But don’t worry about me, poodles, the car was inhabited by co-workers. Actually, it was a delightful mix of people that would have put G.W. Bush into seizures: a liberal woman, a lesbian and two gay men. Conversation ranged from other co-workers to polyamory. I’m not going to go into the discussion about the frequently cool temperatures of a specific person’s posterior because that person may start a blog with a clever related to that topic. I got everybody’s permission to name drop so I’d like to thank Ellen, Lise and Chris for picking me up.


Anyway, now for some rambling:


1 – I love “My Name is Earl”. It comes on after “The Biggest Loser” so I get sucked right in. But I love it – white trash entertains me. And this show has them in spades. Earl’s ex-wife is hilarious. But mostly, I find Earl to be rather sexy. In last night’s episode he was having knives thrown at him by a mother/daughter beauty pageant team. He told the little girl to throw the knife into his leg so she could get out of the contestant industry and grow up to go to medical school (something the mother strongly discourages…she’d rather have a beauty queen daughter). Anyway, as Earl is strapped to the board waiting for the knives to be hurled at him, he does these adorable neck moves along with the music. And I find is moustache sexy. Do you think less of me?


2 – I had another peculiar dream last night. I was going on vacation with my cousin (who I rarely see). We were flying to just outside of NYC (probably New Jersey based on the skyline view from the plane). Oh, and we were flying first class, but our seats were actually in the cockpit.


Anyway, we landed on a residential street chock full of McMansions. We got out and started talking with the locals and then took a corner and all of a sudden we were in the heart of a big city. My cousin and I walked, talked and shopped for awhile until, being the pee-shy person that I am, I couldn’t find a public restroom. I decided to walk back to the plane since their bathrooms are private.


I found the plane and walked back to the coach section and entered the bathroom. But as I started going, the plane started taxiing down the street and I nearly fell down. I finished my business and opened the door only to find that the interior of the plan had turned into some sort of wind tunnel candy machine. I looked to the left and there were bright lights and this opening that would contract and expand (to dispense candy).


Then it opened up and I saw that Rosie O’Donnell was stuck. She was trying to make it through the opening. She was screaming and screaming but I couldn’t figure out why until the opening expanded further and she plopped through and blew past me (it’s a wind tunnel, don’t forget). I noticed that her backsides were all scratched and bloody. I turned to look at the opening again only to find that Godzilla was there and he had been mauling her.


I went back into the bathroom and decided to wait it out until the plane stopped taxiing.


Then I woke up. What does that mean?

8 Comments

  1. Comment by Lise on November 2, 2005 12:19 pm

    Honey, we’ll pick you up anytime! 😉

  2. Comment by karyn on November 2, 2005 12:36 pm

    It means you need to stop watching My Name Is Earl until you no longer find him sexy. Karl, that is WRONG… I wouldn’t worry about the dream nearly so much as I would your apparent lusting after redneck caricatures…what would the O’Ville contingent think? What would PETER think? Oh my. *snert*

  3. Comment by J.P. on November 2, 2005 1:39 pm

    I find Jason Lee very attractive as well, though I have to admit that I like him bearded then just the plain mustache. I can’t bring myself to watch the show though.

  4. Comment by JC on November 2, 2005 2:27 pm

    Jason Lee is cute as hell. I don’t get the redneck thing though. Flannel should only be for lesbians with mullets, unless we’re trying to start up some retro-90s grunger look. Which, by the way, is also wrong.

  5. Comment by jeff on November 2, 2005 4:32 pm

    He is cute, but I like him with the full-beard better than just the mustache.

  6. Comment by Sean on November 2, 2005 7:51 pm

    It seems to me that the worse Jason Lee looks, the better he acts, so he can keep his “living under an overpass” style, as far as I’m concerned. Karl, how the HELL do remember all the minutiae of your dreams? I’ve had some f’d up ones myself, but most disolve into the ether about two minutes after I wake up. I’m jealous.

  7. Comment by Karl on November 2, 2005 8:16 pm

    Well, I don’t normally remember my dreams, actually. I’ve just had two really vivid once in the past week.

    I must have a lot going on in my head. Or I’m crazy. I wouldn’t put it past me.

  8. Comment by Brad on November 3, 2005 2:36 pm

    It means that you’ve been watching too much “My Name Is Earl” . . . poodles?? What will you be calling us next? Possums? Or is that too close to imitating the Dame?

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